Stephen Colbert has had it with the PizzaGate conspiracy theorists, fake news and its purveyors like Alex Jones, Wikileaks, and those who are trolling Reddit, and wants them to "grow the f*ck up". "We all know the only people who are trapped in a pizza place are those robots at Chuck E. Cheese's".
As Colbert noted, the police won't investigate because the pizzeria doesn't have a basement.
"Now, I am flattered that this guy considered it an achievement that he somehow booked President Clinton on my basic-cable news parody puppet show", Colbert said. "Which can only mean one thing", Colbert quips.
He also delivered an epic take-down of Donald Trump's national security Advisor, General Michael Flynn, who has actually been spreading a related story that sounds very similar to PizzaGate.
Colbert then pointed out that perhaps this conspiracy goes all the way to the top to our next president since the show exchanged a series of emails with candidate Trump when he appeared on The Late Show past year.
Colbert wrapped up the segment by revealing that he is in cahoots not only with the left but also with our current presidential-elect, producing actual evidence that Trump's appearance on the Late Show was rehearsed beforehand.
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The super sleuths have determined Colbert is on Clinton's payroll after Wikileaks published three-year-old emails to Podesta, in which a Clinton flak took credit for booking President Bill Clinton on Colbert's Comedy Central show.
Colbert acknowledged he does make some agreements about what to talk about with the people he has on his show, including politicians like Clinton and Trump.
Most of the accusations against Colbert-he discusses scheduling with guests before they appear on the show, his team pre-interviews them-are common practice for TV interviews, and he notes he did the same for President-elect Donald Trump.
Later, after detailing how Wikileaks, conspiracy theorist Alex Jones and a sub-thread on Reddit involved his former Comedy Central TV show, "The Colbert Report", in the whole mess, the comedian had only four words.
"Look around the country", Colbert concluded, "wouldn't you agree we need more adults?"